I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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