The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I had to cum in my sink.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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