Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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