Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
pop tarts are not kleenex
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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