she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
