Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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