YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Farmville is her only friend.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Randomize
