New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
That accounts for only three of the penises
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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