who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Your penis caused this!
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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