Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
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I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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