i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
