i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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