Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
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