Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
