you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Randomize