when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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