Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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