it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
