Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Text me some of your sweat
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