I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
