i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
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just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit