Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
