The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
