You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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