tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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