my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
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