Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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