I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Randomize
