Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(919): View more from North Carolina

I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.

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(416): View more from Ontario

Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up

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(914): View more from New York

Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!

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(619): View more from California

you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top

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19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
Read it at the TFLN blog
(845): View more from New York

We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?

(1-845): View more from New York

Who won mens moguls?

(845): View more from New York

That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.

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(309): View more from Illinois

Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.

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(256): View more from Alabama

Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement

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(620): View more from Kansas

He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..

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