why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Randomize
