I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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