i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
