Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
