And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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