Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
The uberlube is also flammable
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
