yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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