break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
