I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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