may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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