Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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