I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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