Porn is love you can see.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize