Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
should my penis look like a turkey
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
