I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize