Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
