I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
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