I love black thongs
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
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