So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
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I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
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Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.