after a month anything with tits is on the radar
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
