i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
