You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
